I Stalked My Boss Before Getting Hired (And You Should Too)

Hey friend,

Let me tell you about the time I did something that probably sounds a little crazy - but it ended up saving my career.

I was interviewing for what looked like the perfect job. Great company, solid salary, interesting work. The interview went well enough, but something felt... off. The hiring manager seemed dismissive, a little impatient with my questions. But hey, maybe they were just having a bad day, right?

Most people would have left it at that. Crossed their fingers and hoped for the best.

But I did something different. Something that 99% of job seekers never think to do.

I researched the hell out of my potential boss.

There's a verse in Proverbs that completely changed how I think about job interviews: "Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another."

Here's what I love about this - it assumes both pieces of iron are valuable. It's not like one piece is doing all the sharpening while the other just sits there passively. They're both contributing to making each other better.

That's the mindset I want you to have going into interviews. You're not just hoping they'll choose you. You're also evaluating whether they're the kind of people who will sharpen you, challenge you, and help you grow.

Because here's the brutal truth: a bad boss can make your life absolutely miserable, even if everything else about the job looks perfect on paper.

So, back to my story. That interview with the dismissive hiring manager? Instead of just waiting to hear back, I decided to do some digging.

I went to LinkedIn and looked up everyone who had worked with this person at their previous company. Then I sent messages to two of their former colleagues - not subordinates, that would be weird - but peers who had worked alongside them.

My message was simple: "Hi Sarah, I see you worked with John Smith at ABC Company. I'm interviewing for a position on his team at XYZ Corp, and I want to make sure it's a good mutual fit. Would you mind sharing what it was like working with him?"

Both people responded. And what they told me probably saved me from the worst career mistake of my life.

Independently, they both described this person as a micromanager who took credit for other people's work and had serious anger management issues. One of them told me that three people had quit in six months because of this person's leadership style.

I withdrew from consideration immediately. Six months later, I heard through the grapevine that the person they hired instead had already quit.

This is what I call "reverse due diligence," and it's about to become your secret weapon.

Everyone knows companies check your references. They call your former bosses to make sure you're not terrible at your job or secretly a disaster to work with.

But why don't we flip that around? Why don't we check their references too?

Think about it - you're about to spend 40+ hours a week with these people. You're going to be working under their leadership, dealing with their management style, navigating their company culture. This decision affects your daily happiness, career growth, mental health, and family life.

So why do we act like we're just grateful to be considered, instead of also evaluating whether they're good enough for us?

I know what you're thinking: "This sounds stalker-ish" or "What if they find out I was asking about them?"

Here's the thing - this is completely professional and above-board. You're making an important career decision. Due diligence is not only appropriate, it's smart.

Here's exactly how to do it:

Step 1: Find their LinkedIn profile. Look at their work history, not just their current role.

Step 2: Identify former colleagues. Look for people who worked alongside them as peers (not people who reported to them - that could get awkward).

Step 3: Send a professional message. Something like: "Hi [Name], I see you worked with [Interviewer] at [Company]. I'm interviewing for a position on their team and want to ensure it's a good mutual fit. Would you mind sharing what it was like working with them? I'm particularly interested in their leadership style and what type of person thrives on their team."

Step 4: Use what you learn. If you discover red flags, factor that into your decision. If you learn positive things, use that knowledge to tailor your interview approach.

"But what if my interviewer finds out I was researching them?"

Honestly? They probably will find out eventually. And that's actually a good thing.

If they find out and they're upset about it, that tells you something important about their character and leadership style. Good leaders appreciate thoroughness and strategic thinking.

If they find out and they're impressed, congratulations - you've just demonstrated that you're the kind of person who takes important decisions seriously and does their homework.

I've had hiring managers tell me they were impressed that I took the initiative to research them and their team. It showed that I wasn't desperate for just any job - I was looking for the right job.

But here's where this strategy gets really powerful. You don't just use this information to avoid bad situations - you use it to absolutely crush your interviews.

Let's say you learn that your potential boss really values initiative, or that they're known for supporting professional development, or that they give their team a lot of autonomy.

Now you can tailor your interview answers to speak directly to what they actually care about, not just what the job description says they care about.

During your interview, you can say something like: "When I spoke with Maria Johnson, who worked with you at your previous company, she mentioned how much you value employees who take initiative. That really resonated with me because in my last role, I identified a process improvement that..."

Look what just happened. You've demonstrated that you:

That's not just answering their questions anymore. That's showing them exactly why they need to hire you.

Some of you might be thinking, "This seems like a lot of work for one interview."

And you're right. It is more work than just showing up and hoping for the best.

But here's what I've learned: the people who are willing to do the work that most people won't do are the ones who get results that most people don't get.

Most job seekers spray resumes everywhere and hope something sticks. They show up to interviews unprepared and wing it. They take jobs without really understanding what they're getting into, then wonder why they're miserable six months later.

But you? You're going to be different. You're going to do the work upfront to make sure you're pursuing the right opportunities with the right people.

Here's the spiritual truth underneath all of this: God cares deeply about where you work and who you work for. He cares whether you're in an environment that allows you to use your gifts well, grow in your abilities, and serve others effectively.

The Bible talks about iron sharpening iron. That means you should be looking for people who will challenge you in good ways, support your growth, and help you become better at what you do.

When you do reverse due diligence, you're not being presumptuous - you're being wise. You're stewarding your career and your calling by making sure you place yourself in environments where you can flourish.

Here's what I want you to do right now. Think about your next interview opportunity - whether it's one you already have scheduled or one you're hoping to get.

Go to LinkedIn and research your interviewer. Understand their background, their career path, and the companies they've worked for. Then identify two or three people who have worked with them as peers.

Craft that message I showed you earlier. Be genuine about wanting to ensure it's a good mutual fit. Send it today.

And then - this is crucial - actually use what you learn. If you discover concerning patterns, factor that into your decision-making. If you learn positive things, incorporate that knowledge into how you present yourself.

Here's what I love about this approach: it completely changes how you feel walking into interviews.

Instead of sitting there hoping they'll like you, you're evaluating whether you like them. Instead of being a desperate candidate, you're being a discerning professional.

And when you approach interviews with this mindset - confident, prepared, strategic - you actually become more attractive to good employers. Confidence is magnetic, and nothing builds confidence like being thoroughly prepared and knowing you have choices.

You're not just looking for any job. You're looking for the right job, with the right people, in the right environment.

And that job? It's worth doing the extra work to find it.

Keep believing in your breakthrough,

RL, Rose Recruiting

P.S. Friday we're covering the final piece of this puzzle - how to walk into that interview and absolutely blow them away with something 99.9% of candidates never think to bring. It's called a "Value Demonstration Portfolio," and it's going to change everything about how you show up in interviews.

Enjoying this series? Forward it to a friend who's job hunting - they'll thank you for the insider strategies.

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